EP #18 - Bling Ballz

by The Bassturd & MC Keef

supported by
/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

      name your price

     

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

about

#18 in a series of 20 EPs - Check out the award-winning animated video for "Bling Ballz" by Pope TCB at www.youtube.com/watch?v=B1WQZ_kfvqI

credits

released March 1, 2008

All tracks written by The Bassturd and MC Keef, with additional writing by LL Cool Llwynn, Melanie Joy, MC Sugar Britches, Bill Latham, and Ed Ringtone - Guitar and bass guitar performed by Chris Siddall - Scratching and samples performed and provided by Hermes - Produced by The Bassturd - Mastered by Rob "Steely" Bennett for the Loss Foundation

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

The Bassturd Las Vegas, Nevada

contact / help

Contact The Bassturd

Streaming and
Download help

Shipping and returns

Redeem code

Track Name: The Bassturd, MC Keef and Hermes - Bling Ballz
I'LL LET YOU FELLAS IN ON A LITTLE SECRET THAT I KNOW
IT SEEMS THAT HONIES LIKE GUYS WHO GENITALS GLOW
DON'T ATTEMPT UNLESS YOU'RE HARDCORE
DON'T TRY IT IF YOU LACK GUTS
BLING BALLZ - BEDAZZLER - RHINESTONE YOUR NUTS
BLING BALLZ IS A NEW TREND
A GRILL FOR YOUR NUT SACK
THIS SHIT AIN'T FOR SUCKERS
I'M AS REAL AS A HEART ATTACK
GRAB YOUR BEDAZZLER
CUBIC ZIRCONIUM
GIRLS LINE UP AROUND THE BLOCK JUST SO YOU CAN BONE THEM
NOW I KNOW IT AIN'T EASY TO STAB YOUR BALLZ
IT HURTS TO STAND UP BUT INSIDE YOU'RE WALKING TALL
YOU GOTTA BE A MAN TO PIERCE YOUR TENDER SCROTAL SKIN
JUST REMEMBER ALL THE ASS AND TITTIES YOU'LL BE SWIMMING IN
REMEMBER TO CLEAN AND POLISH YOUR STONES TWICE A DAY
OR ELSE YOUR FRIENDS WILL START TO THINK THAT YOU WORK AT FRITO-LAY
BUT EVEN IF YOUR TESTICLES SMELL LIKE ASS AND STILTON
BLING BALLZ PERFECTLY ACCESSORIZE BITCHES LIKE PARIS HILTON
TRUE GANGSTERS WEAR THEIR BLING BALLZ UNDERNEATH A KILT
DISPLAY THEIR BOZAKS PROUDLY
NOT HAVING ANY GUILT
AND WHEN THE SUNLIGHT CATCHES - SPLASHES COLOR ON THE GROUND
YOUR LASER LIGHT SHOW CAUSES HEARTS TO POUND

BLING BALLZ - BEDAZZLER - RHINESTONE MY NUTS
BLING BALLZ - BEDAZZLER - RHINESTONE MY NUTS

YO, DECK THE HALLS WITH BLING BALLZ OF RHINESTONE
IF YOU COME AROUND I'LL PRETEND I'M NOT HOME
GETTING BEDAZZLED - AFFIXING STUDS TO MY NUT SACK
THE POINT OF NO RETURN HAS BEEN PASSED
I CAN'T TURN BACK
ONCE YOU GOT THEM SHITS ON YOUR NUTS IT'S PERMANENT
IT'S LIKE DIPPING 'EM IN CEMENT EXCEPT YOU WON'T LAMENT
I VENT FRUSTRATION THROUGH COLORFUL SCROTAL DECORATIONS
ALTHOUGH HIDEOUS I THINK IT'S MY GREATEST CREATION
IF YOU AIN'T HIP TO THE STYLE THAT I ROCK - LET ME EXPLAIN
I DON'T APPLY THEM DIRECTLY TO MY COCK
BECAUSE THE BALL SACK IS MY CANVAS
MY BALL BLING SWINGS ILLUMINATING MY MAN NUTS
IT'S EASY, FUN AND FABULOUS - SNAP, PUSH AND POP
IT HURTS LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER BUT I CAN'T STOP
I'M THE BEDAZZLINGEST BEDAZZLING MOTHERFUCKER ON THE BLOCK
MY BALL BLING IS HOT - RIVALS ANYTHING YOU GOT

BLING BALLZ - BEDAZZLER - RHINESTONE MY NUTS
BLING BALLZ - BEDAZZLER - RHINESTONE MY NUTS
Track Name: The Bassturd, MC Keef, LL Cool Llwyn, Bill Latham, Gangsta Bang Bang, and Chris Siddall - Gangsta Shit
WHEN I'M CALLING IN SICK I'M DOING GANGSTA SHIT
BUYING STOCKS ONLINE I'M DOING GANGSTA SHIT
WHEN I'M SHOPPING FOR A BOAT I'M DOING GANGSTA SHIT
WHEN I'M AT THE COUNTRY CLUB I'M DOING GANGSTA SHIT
GOING TO LAMAZE I'M DOING GANGSTA SHIT
WHEN I'M AT THE OLIVE GARDEN DOING GANGSTA SHIT
GOING TO PILATES DOING GANGSTA SHIT
PREPPING FOR THE M-CAT - STRAIGHT-UP GANGSTA SHIT

DOING GANGSTA SHIT
DOING GANGSTA SHIT

WHEN I'M BUYING SLACKS AT YONKERS - DOING GANGSTA SHIT
CONSULTING MY ATTORNEY DOING GANGSTA SHIT
WHEN I'M WATCHING JEOPARDY I'M DOING GANGSTA SHIT
DRINKING LATTE GRANDE - DOING GANGSTA SHIT

DOING GANGSTA SHIT
DOING GANGSTA SHIT

WATCHING A PARADE - DOING GANGSTA SHIT
DOING MINOR HOME REPAIRS - FUCKING GANGSTA SHIT
GETTING A BRAZILIAN WAX - DOING GANGSTA SHIT
GLASS OF METAMUCIL - DOING GANGSTA SHIT

DONG GANGSTA SHIT
DOING GANGSTA SHIT

TALKING TO MY MOM I'M DOING GANGSTA SHIT
KICKING ASS AT SCRABBLE - DOING GANGSTA SHIT
DRINKING ARBOR MIST - DOING GANGSTA SHIT
READING THE ECONOMIST - YO - GANGSTA SHIT
Track Name: The Bassturd, MC Keef, MC Sugar Britches, Lady Snapper and Chris Siddall - Nocturnal Emissions
CLOSE THOSE PEEPERS

I LOVE OUR NEW ARRANGEMENT
THE PROMISES WE KEEP
THAT WE'LL ONLY DO THE DEED WHEN ONE OF US IS ASLEEP
YOU'RE SO SEXY WHEN YOU'RE SLEEPING
YOU CAN'T BE MISUNDERSTOOD
SO THE ONLY TIMES I COME
ARE WHEN I JUMP YOUR MORNING WOOD
YOUR SNORING WAKES ME UP
GETS ME IN THE MOOD
FOR A MIDNIGHT SNACK
BUT I AIN'T TALKING ABOUT FOOD
YOU REALLY FILL ME UP
MAKES ME WANT TO SCREAM
EVERY NIGHT YOU AND I BE HAVING WET DREAMS

YO BABY, YOU ASLEEP?
FUCKING SWEET - I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS SHIT ALL FUCKING WEEK
I HAD TO WORK EARLY
I WAS OUT BY TEN
BUT NOW IT'S LATE
I'M AWAKE AND YOU'RE SLEEPING
SO AS PER OUR AGREEMENT
I CONSIDER IT MY DUTY
TO BUST MY FUCKING NUT UP INSIDE YOUR SLEEPING BOOTY

BACK IN HIGH SCHOOL BUT I'M STILL 29
I'VE GOT SNAKES INSTEAD OF ARMS
BUT ALL THE GIRLS THINK I'M FINE
THEY START TO PET MY SNAKES
UNTIL THEY'RE SHEDDING THEIR SKINS
EVERYONE DISROBES
THEN WE START FUCKING
HELEN MIRREN HANDS ME A SWEET LOLLIPOP
SO I'M SUCKING AND LICKING
AND SHE'S ON TOP
THEN I'M IN BED WITH BJORK
SWINGING BALLS DEEP
MAN THE ONLY WAY TO GO IS GET FUCKED WHEN YOU'RE ASLEEP

THE BEST SLEEP SEX YOU CAN TRY IF YOU DARE
IS TO GET IT ON WITH YOUR GIRL WHILE SHE'S HAVING NIGHT TERRORS
SOME CLAIM IT'S SADISTIC AND DEVIOUS
BUT THE BEST SLEEP SEX YOU CAN GET IN MY EXPERIENCE
IS HAVE A GO AT IT WHILE YOUR PARTNER IS HAVING DREAM TERRORS
I DO MY PART TO FUCK THE TRAUMA RIGHT OUT OF YOUR NIGHTMARES
YOU'RE SCREAMING AND FLAILING - FIGHTING DEMONS
HAVING MULTIPLE ORGASMS - THAT AIN'T FAIRY DUST - IT'S SEMEN

YO MY GIRL SLEEPWALKS
IT GETS ME KIND OF DISCONCERTED
SCURRYING RIGHT BEHIND HER TRYING TO KEEP MY DICK INSERTED
I NEED TO KEEP UP WITH HER
GOTTA GO FULL THROTTLE
IF I DONG POPS OUT IT'S LIKE THE GENNI OUT THE BOTTLE
AND SHE STARTS HAVING NIGHTMARES
NO SHIT
THE ONLY CURE THAT WORKS FOR HER IS MORE SWEET DICK
UNTIL SHE CUMS IN HER SLEEP
IT CALMS HER RIGHT DOWN
I CAN LAY DOWN WITH HER
RIDE THE BUS TO DREAM TOWN

NOCTURNAL EMISSIONS
SLEEP SEX
NOCTURNAL EMISSIONS
SLEEP SEX
NOCTURNAL EMISSIONS
SLEEP SEX
I LOVE SLEEP SEX
YO IT'S THE BEST

NOCTURNAL EMISSIONS
SLEEP SEX
NOCTURNAL EMISSIONS
SLEEP SEX
NOCTURNAL EMISSIONS
SLEEP SEX
I LOVE SLEEP SEX
YO IT'S THE BEST
Track Name: The Bassturd, MC Keef, Bill Latham and Chris Siddall - Master Debator
RIDING IN A COASTING MOTOR VEHICLE WITHOUT AN OPERATOR IS VERY DANGEROUS AND IT COULD LEAD TO LOSS OF LIFE OR
SEVERE DAMAGE TO MULTIPLE PARTS OF YOUR BODY
YOUR HEAD, NECK, FACE, LEGS AND FEET
AND FOR THESE REASONS I SAY IT SHOULD BE OUTLAWED
SEND OUT THE BOYS IN BLUE
SEND OUT A WHOLE SQUAD
TO BRING IN THESE DELINQUENTS - THESE HOOLIGANS
BRING AND ABRUPT END TO THEIR UNHOLY SHENANIGANS

GHOST RIDING THE WHIP IS THE DOPEST THING TO HIT THE SCENE
YOU THROW THAT SHIT IN AUTOMATIC
JUMP OUT CONFIDENT AND CLEAN
AND THEN ESCORT YOUR UNMANNED VEHICLE UP AND DOWN THE STREET
CHECK IT OUT - IT'S LIKE THERE'S A GHOST IN THE DRIVER SEAT
I SEE NO REASON WHY THE TEXAS HOUSE SHOULD PASS A LAW
THE PHILOSOPHY GUIDING THIS SCHEME IS FLAWED
YOU'LL GET RUN OVER BY YOUR OWN CAR SOONER OR LATER
THAT'S A FACT - I SHOULD KNOW - I'M THE MASTER DEBATER

YOU NEED TO DOUBLE CHECK YOUR SOURCES LITTLE MAN
MY STATISTICS SAY "YOU'RE STUPID" - YOU UNDERSTAND?
490 KIDS ALREADY DIED THIS YEAR
BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT IT WOULD BE COOL TO LET A GHOST STEER
I CAN REFUTE EVERY FALSE CLAIM THAT FALLS OUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH
YOU THINK YOU CAN PLAY DUMB JUST BECAUSE WE'RE IN THE SOUTH?
COME CORRECT - PLAY IT STRAIGHT - DON'T BE A KNOWLEDGE HATER
ADMIT TO THE TRUTH - I'M THE MASTER DEBATER

WELL I HEAR A LOT OF HOT AIR
BUT I DON'T SEE NO SUBSTANCE
IT SEEMS TO ME THAT MAYBE DUDE
YOU'RE A FUCKING DUMB SHIT
HAVE YOU EVER EVEN GHOST RIDDEN THE WHIP?
"NO"
WELL LET ME TELL YOU FROM FIRST-HAND EXPERIENCE
THAT SHIT IS OFF THE HOOK Y'ALL
IT MAKES YOU LOOK ALL FUCKABLE
PARTY PEOPLE DIGGING YOUR GEAR, YOUR MOVES AND YOUR VEHICLE
NATURAL SELECTION - THE FITTEST SHALL SURVIVE
SO MY ADVICE TO YOU IS TO LEARN TO FUCKING DRIVE

I CAN DRIVE FINE YOU MOTHER FUCKING ASSHOLE
BUT I KNOW THEY GOT NO DRIVER'S ED. IN EL PASO
THE ONLY REASON YOUR DUMB ASS RIDES THE WHIP
YOU AIN'T OLD ENOUGH TO JUST GO GET YOUR PERMIT
IF YOU THINK THAT IT COULDN'T HAPPEN TO YOU FOOL
MY BROTHER DIED GHOST RIDING THE WHIP - SO FUCK YOU
LAUGH NOW BUT SOON ENOUGH I'LL BE PISSING ON YOUR COFFIN
HERE LIES DUMB ASS - KILLED BY HIS OWN GREMLIN

YO, FUCK YOU BITCH AND YOUR FUCKING DEAD BROTHER
YOU BOTH APPEAR TO BE THE PRODUCTS OF AN INBRED MOTHER
HOW THE FUCK DO YOU DIE GOING FIVE MILES AN HOUR?
STATISTICALLY 60 IDIOTS DIE AN HOUR
SO I GUESS WE CAN JUST CHALK YOUR BROTHER'S DEATH UP TO STUPIDITY?
A LAW THAT BANS MORONS LIKE YOU IS WHAT THERE OUGHT TO BE
WHEN IT COMES TO DEBATE
YOU'RE GREAT, BUT I'M GREATER
IN FACT I'M THE BEST
I'M THE MASTER DEBATER

BITCH YOU DID IT NOW
I KNOW WHERE YOU FUCKING LIVE
AND I'LL BE THERE TONIGHT WITH MY FRIENDS AND A SHIV
YOU'LL BE CRYING ON THE GROUND IN YOUR FILTHY WIFE BEATER
IF YOU'RE LUCKY, YOU'LL GHOST RIDE MY 9 MILLIMETER
SO WHEN MY BULLET MAKES YOUR BRAIN GHOST RIDE YOUR SKULL
AND YOUR SOUL GHOST RIDES ITS WAY DOWN INTO HELL
IT'S LIKE YOU'RE DICK CHENEY
AND I'M RALPH NADER
MORE PAINFUL SHOULD BE KNOWING I'M THE MASTER DEBATER

YOU DON'T SCARE ME
YOUR DEBATE SKILLS ARE WEAK
YOU'RE A BED WETTING, INARTICULATE, FUCKING FREAK MAN

I TOLD YOU DUDE - I GOT A WEAK BLADDER
SHUT YOUR MOTHER FUCKING MOUTH OR I'LL FILL IT WITH BABY BATTER

YO FUCK THIS - I'M THROUGH WASTING MY TIME DUDE
I'VE MADE MY POINT, AND BESIDES, I FEEL SORRY FOR YOU
YOU'RE LIKE THE SACRIFICIAL VIRGIN I THROW IN THE CRATER
YOU BEEN SERVED MOTHERFUCKER
BY THE MASTER DEBATER
Track Name: The Bassturd, MC Keef, Bill Latham, MC Mitchslap, Chris Siddall and Hermes - Don't Get Any On Me
GETTING DRIZZLE DOWN MY CHIN
MAKES MY KNEES WEAK AND MY HEAD SPIN
I LOVE YOU GIRL
BUT I CAN'T FRONT
I DON'T WANT JUICES FROM YOUR PUDDING POP
THERE'S ONE THING BABE THAT WILL DISRUPT US
GET ANY ON ME I'LL BRING THE MOTHERFUCKING RUCKUS

GIRL I KNOW THIS GOTTA SOUND JUST A LITTLE WEIRD
BUT I'D RATHER IF YOU DIDN'T STRAIGHT-UP SOAK MY BEARD
YOU KNOW, IF YOU SUCK MY DONG I WON'T POP OFF IN YOUR MOUTH
SO GIVE ME SOME WARNING AND I'LL GET YOU A TOWEL
EVER SINCE THAT TIME WE MADE SWEET LOVE LAST JUNE
I'VE BEEN CLEANING UP AND SWIFFERING AND BLEACHING MY ROOM
AND YOU KNOW THAT I DON'T EVER WANT TO DO THAT SHIT AGAIN
KEEP MY CHEST HAIR LIKE THE DESERT AND YOU'LL ALWAYS BE MY FRIEND
GIRL, WHEN YOU SAID THAT YOU WOULD BE MY WIFE
I KNEW I WOULD HAVE A PARTNER FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
BUT EVERY TIME I SEE THAT FLUID WELLING UP TO FLOW
MY BOWELS GET ALL RUNNY AND MY LUNCH GETS UP TO GO

YO, ONCE I SAW YA GET SOME ON YA
WHEN YOU WAS IN THE SAUNA
EATING A PUDDING POP
DAMN GIRL - DON'T STOP
UNTIL JUST RIGHT BEFORE A DROP OF IT HITS MY SKIN
EVERY TIME IT MAKES CONTACT I START TWITCHING
GODDAMN THAT SHIT IS COLD
MAKES ME PHYSICALLY ILL G
THEN IT DRIES UP AND IT GETS GROSS AND STICKY
I'M STRICTLY STERILE WHEN IT COMES TO MAKING LOVE
I ALWAYS WEAR A MASK AND THREE LATEX GLOVES

GIRL - DON'T GET ANY ON ME
ON ME - DON'T GET ANY GIRL
GIRL - DON'T GET ANY ON ME
ON ME - DON'T GET ANY GIRL

GIRL - DON'T GET ANY ON ME
I DON'T WANT THAT IN MY MOUTH
I KNOW IT'S FULL OF PROTEIN
BUT I DON'T NEED THAT WHEN I'M FISHING DOWN SOUTH
GIRL - DON'T GET ANY ON ME
ON ME - DON'T GET ANY GIRL
I LIKE TO PRETEND I'M BONING BILL COSBY
BUT IT FUCKS IT UP IF YOU GET ANY ON ME

FUCK YOU - DON'T GET ANY ON ME
FUCK YOU - DON'T GET ANY ON ME
FUCK YOU - DON'T GET ANY ON ME
FUCK YOU - DON'T GET ANY ON ME